*
2. Mulla Nasruddin used to visit a saint. He visited for many, many days. And the saint was a silent one; he will not speak anything.
Then Mulla Nasruddin had to say, he had to ask, "I have been coming again and again, waiting that you will say something, and you have not said anything. And unless you say, I cannot understand, so just give me a message for my life, a direction so that I can move in that direction."
So that Sufi sage said, "NEKI KAR KUYEN MAY DAL: Do good and throw it in the well." It is one of the oldest Sufi sayings: "Do good and throw it in the well." It means do good and forget it immediately; don't carry that "I have done good."
So next day Mulla Nasruddin helped one old woman to cross the road, and then he pushed her into the well.
"NEKI KAR KUYEN MAY DAL: DO good and throw it in the well."
3. I have heard Mulla Nasruddin was sitting in a pub drinking. He was not a brave man, one of the most coward. But alcohol gave him courage. And then a man, a giant of a man, entered the pub ferocious looking, dangerous, looked like a murderer. At any other time, in his senses, Mulla Nasruddin would have been afraid. But now he was drunk, so he was not afraid at all.
That ferocious looking man came near to Mulla, and seeing that he is not afraid at all he stomped on his feet.
Mulla got angry, furious, and he said, "What are you doing? Are you doing that on purpose or it is just a sort of joke?" But by this time, his stomping on his feet, Mulla was brought back from his alcohol. He was brought back; he came to his senses. But he has said, "What are you doing -- on purpose or it is just a sort of joke?"
The man said, "On purpose."
Mulla Nasruddin said, "Then thank you. On purpose, it is okay, because I don't like such type jokes"
*
4. Mulla Nasruddin was standing before his veterinary doctor with his dog and insisting that, "Cut the tail of my dog." The doctor was saying, "But why, Nasruddin? If I cut the tail of your dog, this beautiful dog will be destroyed. He will look ugly. And why you are insisting this?" Nasruddin said, "Between you and me, don't say this to anybody: I want the dog's tail to be cut because my mother-in-law is going to come soon and I don't want any sign of welcome in my house. I have removed everything. Only this dog, he can welcome my mother-in-law."
*
5. Mulla Nasruddin was passing along a street...
And he saw a beautiful young woman so he gave her a good nudge. The woman was shocked, because Mulla was old; all his hairs were pure silver white. The woman said, "You should be ashamed -- all your hairs are pure white. You are the age of my grandfather -- you should have been dead by now. You are showing your ugliness....
Mulla said, "Listen, my hairs are white, that's true, but my heart is still black -- dark black."
*
6. Mulla Nasruddin used to purchase shoes which were too tight for him, one size too small. He was continually complaining and grumbling to everybody, "I will die with these shoes!"
People said, "Why don't you change them?"
When he came the next time to the shoe store to change them, he again asked for the same size. The shoemaker said, "Are you mad or something? That shoe is always going to give you problems."
Mulla Nasruddin said, "There is a great philosophy in it. I have so many problems; this shoe keeps me busy, and all other worries become small. I have to manage to walk in these shoes. The only way I know to avoid those other worries is to create a bigger worry. This is so simple. And in the night when I come home, and I take the shoes off... boy, what a relief! This shoe is my only hope to find some relief in life."
*
7. Mulla Nasruddin was being analyzed by a psychiatrist. After many months of analysis, many meetings, the psychiatrist said, as Mulla lay on the couch: 'This is what I feel, this is what I conclude: you need to fall in love, you need a beautiful feminine object. Love is your need.'
Mulla said, 'Between me and you, don't you think love is silly?'
The psychiatrist said, 'Between me and you? -- it would be absurd!'
*
8. Mulla Nasruddin once fell in a river, and he was just going to be drowned. He was not a religious man, but suddenly, at the verge of death, he cried loudly, "Allah, God, please save me, help me, and from today, now I will pray and I will do whatsoever is written in the scriptures."
While he was saying this "God help me", he caught hold of a branch hanging over on the river. And when he was grabbing and, coming toward safety, he felt relaxed, and he said, "Now it is okay. Now you need not worry." He told again to God, "Now you need not worry. Now I am safe." Suddenly the branch broke, and he fell again. So he said, "Can't you take a simple joke?"
*
9. One day, just in the morning, Mulla Nasruddin's wife said to Mulla that, "In the night, while you were asleep, you were insulting me. You were saying things against me, swearing against me. What do you mean? You will have to explain."
Mulla Nasruddin said, "But who says that I was asleep? I was not asleep. Just the things I want to say, I cannot say in the day. I cannot gather so much courage."
*
10. I remember once Mulla Nasruddin was working as a doorkeeper in a museum. The first day he was appointed, he asked for the rules: "What rules have to be followed?" So he was given the book of the rules that were to be followed by the doorkeeper. He memorized them; he took every care not to forget a single detail.
And the first day when he was on duty, the first visitor came. He told the visitor to leave his umbrella there outside with him at the door. The visitor was amazed. He said, "But I don't have any umbrella." So Nasruddin said, "In that case, you will have to go back. Bring an umbrella because this is the rule. Unless a visitor leaves his umbrella here outside, he cannot be allowed in."
*
11. Once Mulla Nasruddin was shopping in a village. He left his donkey on the street and went into a shop to purchase something. When he came out he was furious. Someone has painted his donkey completely red, bright red. So he was furious and he inquired, "Who has done this? I will kill that man!"
A small boy was standing there. He said, "One man has done this, and that man just has gone inside the pub." So Nasruddin went there, rushed there, angry, mad. He said, "Who has done this? Who the hell has painted my donkey?"
A very big man, very strong, stood and he said, "I did. What about it?"
So Nasruddin said, "Thank you, sir. You have done such a beautiful job. I just came to tell you that the first coat is dry."
*
12. Once Mulla Nasruddin was forced to come to the court because he has been found again drunk on the street.
The magistrate said, "Nasruddin, I remember seeing you so many times for this same offence. Have you got any explanation for your habitual drunkenness?"
Nasruddin said, "Of course, your Honor. I have an explanation for my habitual drunkenness. This is my explanation: habitual thirst."
*
13. Mulla Nasruddin was in love with a woman, and as women are prone to ask, the woman asked, when Mulla Nasruddin kissed her, "Are you kissing me the first woman? Am I the first woman whom you are kissing? Is your first kiss given to a woman?"
Nasruddin said, "Yes, the first and the most sweetest."
..............Neelanjna
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